Wednesday, 23 July 2008

Mmm, sexy stockings baby

Howdi ho y'all,
Quite a low key day today. Woke up, not quite feeling 100%, bit of a sore throat and general malaise, but I got on with things, dropped the kids off and then came home. I had to go to the local hospital for 11.30 to be measured up for compression stockings! Ooh, joy and rapture! I get to ponce about in stockings for a while. Who knows where this could lead? One day stockings, the next suspenders and by tuesday week a pair of Jimmy Chu's with 5 inch heels and a diamonte covered bag. Nice!
I got to the hospital and sat in the corridor to wait. Two old dears were already there, complaining. One had been waiting for over an hour and a half and considered the whole episode to be "disgusting" and "unacceptable". The fact that her appointment was at 11.15 and she was only 10 minutes late in, in the end, was not considered. The other dear just nodded, occasional talked over the top about her grandson, who apparent could unravel the very mysteries of time and space, if all she said was to believed. Fianlly another old lady was pushed up in a not too happy looking wheel chair. There she was parked and abandonned. As she interjected in the other two's conversations, it emerged that she had, in order of mention: fell and broke her arm and leg (ouch!), had a minor stroke, had a major stroke, had and beat cancer, got some blood clots and of course a variety of different other minor ailments. I was shocked and humbled by her list. Also, what really freaked me out was when they listed the siblings and children of theirs that they have outlived. A tragic conversation to hear. I really felt for the pain and crap they had been through and how they had come out the other side. Made me want to kick myself for my original mocking view of them and the stereotypical old lady moaning thing. Still, they could whinge for their country.
Anyway, I was finally summoned in, they had me roll up my trouser legs and got out the tape measure. A few measurements later, I was released and told my beautiful new hoisery would be ready in two weeks. I can hardly wait. I hope they do a fish net version, I reckon I'd look the money.


Sandra said...

Oh hey!

One thing that I could not ignore when I was in Cuba was how much the people there loved their bling. Glossy, shiny, metallic looking accessories were a must.
My favourite was a girl at the airport wearing coordinated golden & silver bag and shoes, a see-through golden top and sparkling silver bra – sorry but that would probably beat your diamond bag.
Anyway. Somehow your post reminded me of a guy I saw there, wearing plain neutral coloured clothes and a pair of (very) shiny golden trainers. Would they be just the ticket to go with your stockings?

Way to go, babe...

Damnyoureyes said...

Yeah mate, you can put them in your special only on Thursday's drawer, with those shoes from your favourite 'special' shop.

Keep 'em laughing